The Drink Cart: The Wingman We All Deserved

You’re everyone’s problem. Because every time you drop a campaign, it’s dangerous. That's why we’re kicking off with a tribute to Val Kilmer, the Iceman of branding.

Dear marketing fans, Iceman stans and anyone who prefers their advertising newsletter with dried flower sprinkles.

I watched 1986’s Top Gun so much when it came out on VHS back in the day that I could lip synch the whole movie. That’s a true story. So it was sad to learn that Val Kilmer passed away at 65 this week. The actor had scene stealing roles in Heat, The Doors, True Romance, Top Secret! Willow and Tombstone.

But it was his portrayal of Tom "Iceman" Kazansky that solidified his fame. A polarizing character who ended up as Maverick’s friend for life. When I think of Iceman, I still think of Quentin Tarantino’s wild explanation of Top Gun from 1994’s film, Sleep with me. If Paramount needs an idea, they should be doing an Iceman prequel series.

Whatever you though of Iceman, he was freaking cool. As was Kilmer. A sizzling presence on the big screen.

Now watch this pivot here folks. Legend has it that Kilmer walked off the set of a burger ad at aged 13 due to his dissatisfaction with the product. That’s the kind of actor Kilmer was. Intense, even for a burger ad at 13. But he did do ads, including this great Orange mobile ad.

I wasn’t expecting him to be in these simple Nikon Coolpix 2000 ads either. That hair. I don’t even want to share that there is an amazing extended fanfic cut version. The year 2000 was just wild.

Three wild things that turned my mind to off-brand royal jam this week

• I do not understand why Connor McDavid needs to do real estate ads?

• Someone is out there making vintage Gap store playlists. Here’s the April 1993 edition.

• OpenAI added 1 million users in one hour last week in the height of the images roll out. Sam Altman called it, “biblical demand, i have never seen anything like it.”

You Are Not Ready for Meghan’s Jam. Emotionally. Financially. Or Spiritually.

I’m shamelessly using content from some comments I made on Linkedin. Is that weird? Cringe? What do you expect for a free newsletter?

I was going back and forth with the amazing Vikki Ross. She started it by saying she liked, “the Tips for Enjoyment on Meghan Markle's As Ever site.” I was then thrown into a rage reading the website and was dumbfounded that within an hour of launch she sold out (I would love to know how many of each item they really sold).

I responded to Vikki that “I've never needed a tip to enjoy shortbread. Am I missing something? 😂” She laughed and said that the “tone of the site is a mood.”

I was thinking about that in the back of my mind for the rest of the day.

It occurred to me that the tone and the site aren’t for me. That’s not shocking given the tone feels like you could pipe thoughts and prayers like an icing on top of cake for 129 pages of a brand book. “What began with a small pot of fresh fruit preserves, bubbling away in my home kitchen, has inspired this curated collection to bring surprise and delight to your every day.”

Surprise and delight? That phrase is one of my kryptonites. Curated collection? Megs, it's jam and cookies with flower sprinkles. Not the Louvre. As Ever feels like the grocery store house brand of royalty but more expensive.

I asked ChatGPT to be as cynical as it could be and quite liked this, “Meghan, you married into a family that invented colonialism as a hobby, and now you’re reinventing brunch? Please. You didn’t invent jam. You discovered it—like a settler in an apron.”

The bot was very fired up. To Vikki’s point. It's not bad branding. It’s actually kind of sneakily perfect. That's what makes it so evil. This is branding and copy engineered for an army of pilates enthusiasts who thinks minimalism is a whole personality. I can’t figure out if it’s passive-aggressive elegance, soft-lighting e-commerce narcissism or just royal influencer vibe laundering.

Amidst a rain shower of $15 dried flowers, my humble robot sidekick added, “’I’ll be vomiting into a terracotta ramekin while journaling about how this moment was crafted to inspire joy.”

As ever,

Jackson.

7-11 is winning the content wars this week

I like that people are starting to take notice of the 7-11 social team. The brand’s April Fool’s Day post, ridiculously turned the lower case n to capital N and then watched as fans got unhinged about it.

But that’s not the story. As the comments piled in, the brand’s social team took to action replying to everything with a tone that was all in. And maybe even matching that unhinged vibe.

I love a brand just letting it all hang out and getting real in the comments.

Can I share a story on community management? I was doing some community management for a brand one night years ago. One customer DM’d and asked if one of the team’s was high for something the brand was doing? I replied that not that I am aware of, but maybe i need to go down to the engine room and see for myself. The next morning the brand manager informed me I’d gone too far in suggesting that. I can tell you the brand 100% should have found that funny. The customer did, they stopped complaining.

Another time i felt I was a dart board for people fighting with the brand over a New Year’s Lobster special that had run out. It took everything in my power not to lecture them on this. The lesson? You really need a partner on where the edge of the brand voice sits and you all need to be on the same page.

Ad History: The Grand Daddy of April Fool’s Jokes (1996)

This seems like it should be older. But in 1996, Taco Bell pulled off an all-time Hall of Fame April Fools’ prank. The brand took out full-page ads in several major newspapers to announce that, in a patriotic act of corporate sponsorship, it had purchased the Liberty Bell. The name? The Taco Liberty Bell, of course.

The ad claimed the move was meant to help reduce the national debt. But not everyone got the memo that this was a joke.

Phones lit up. Remember when that could happen? Thousands of furious Americans flooded both the National Park Service and Taco Bell with calls, demanding answers.

Later that day the company came clean. Not before cashing in on millions in free earned media.

Even the White House got in on the joke. Spokesperson Mike McCurry dryly added, "We'll be doing a series of these. Ford Motor Co. is joining today in an effort to refurbish the Lincoln Memorial. It will be the Lincoln Mercury Memorial."

Sometimes, freedom rings.

Sometimes, it’s just the sound of a prank going exactly to plan.

Ad history: Diet Coke Break (1994)

Just over 30 years ago, the Diet Coke ads were pretty thirsty.

This was when 11:30 became the official "window shopping" hour at offices nationwide? That's when Lucky Vanous turned construction sites into runways, and Diet Coke breaks turned him into an iconic 90’s Diet Coke Hunk.

Any ad with Etta James purring "I Just Want to Make Love to You" in the background is going to be a banger. Diet Coke flipped the advertising world upside down and turned the men into the eye candy! The spot would have 5 sequels and even a reboot with Kate Moss in 2023. They do not make ads like this anymore.

Fighting Over Ads in Pop Culture

I’m fascinated by the debate over ads for show like Severance and The White Lotus. I too wonder about fetishizing a hotel brand in hotel with miserable track record for guest safety? But i get it.

It was this take from Mathew Groom, “Severance is about how corporations operate like a cult: they dehumanise and they ruthlessly slice away at all vectors of human connection, to turn resilient communities into isolated individuals.”

His point is valid. Consumers don’t seem to care. Mimicking culture without being curious to what lies underneath is a fundamental shift away from core values. So when Severance is a huge hit, brands cannot resist jumping on big cultural moments and don’t even care or suffer consequences of surfing the wrong wave.

I remember seeing a brand use a meme of Leonardo Dicaprio from Django Unchained to sell consumer goods. He played Calvin Candie, the charismatic yet sadistic owner of Candyland, a plantation where enslaved men are forced into brutal, gladiator-style death matches for entertainment.

Problematic? Yes. But most consumers would just think it’s Dicaprio laughing smugly. Today everything is so surface level, that you can almost get away from it. Even that.

The blueberry muffin theory of excellence

Everything you need to know about attention to detail and being great in the ad business lies within the Casino Blueberry Muffin scene. It’s a masterclass of relentlessness and detail.

Last call: The Drink Cart Rob Roy

Here’s the story. You’re in New York City, 1894. You’re at the bar at the The Waldorf Astoria. A new operetta called Rob Roy based on the legendary Scottish outlaw is about to open.

Think: Scottish Robin Hood or maybe just the Liam Neeson movie from 1995. Sidebar: They do not make trailers like this anymore. It cooks.

As clutch hotel bars so often do, they decide to capitalize on the hype with a cocktail in his name. The humble Rob Roy is born.

It’s basically a Manhattan with Scotch instead of American whiskey (oh how timely in an age of tariffs). But that one little whiskey swap changes everything. You get a Manhattan with more brings in smoke, earth and a bit of that Scottish edge.

Here’s my take on the recipe:

• 2 oz scotch

• 3/4 oz sweet red vermouth

• 4 dashes Angostura bitters

• Serve on the rocks and stir or strain into a fancy coupe or martini glass

• Break out those cherries

Here’s a little completely fabricated “deep thought” to ponder with your Drink Cart Rob Roy with a side of Top Gun intro in honour of Val Kilmer.

Great marketing is more symphony than algorithm. AI can play the notes, but humans compose the music that moves people.

---

Drink Cart Approved™ agency discussion topics

• How many hours did you spend making action figures with AI this week? Did you make Mad Men figures? Guilty.

• The head guy at the Thames Valley District school board had the best April Fool’s Prank. It did not go well.

• This White Lotus finale menu is on pointe.

• This is my “Get me to God’s country.” What’s yours.

• When in doubt, discuss the trending bets on Polymarket.

• It never ends for brands. 2 days after April Fool’s, Doritos is cooking up something.

---

The Drink Cart is your weekly fuel for pop culture brains and ad junkies. A cocktail of ad insights and hot takes that feel like you’re hanging at your favourite dive bar after launching your latest campaign.